Done With College? What What.

This is what I have learned over the past four years.

Ok go:

- Say yes to everything, unless there is a really-legit-good reason not to.
- I am always going to have cleavage. Always, no matter what I wear. That's fine. It's just how it IS.
- It's ok to watch TV. It is also okay to like Ke$ha and buy "Marie Claire" every month at Winco.
-Dessert after every meal is a bad idea. Unfortunately.
- Umm... BANGS. Bangs=awesome. My life became twice as intersting the moment I got bangs.
-There is no reason to do homework in advance. Because, guess what? GPA doesn't matter at all.
- I love to sing jazz.
- There are lots and lots of fantastic people in the world.
-Never trust a boy named Stephen
-It's okay to be pretty good at a lot of things, but not exceptional at any of them.
-I can go almost anywhere on foot.
-Always check for girlfriends.
-Letter-writing is underrated, but should be resurructed.
-I could live on mangos and sandwich thins.
-Everyone is likable if you let yourself like them.
-Karaoke is awesome.
-God is out there.

Lovely Weekend

Spokane finally produced it's first gorgeous spring weekend. Ahhhhh... That is the sound of me giving a huge sigh of relief.

I needed this weekend to re-realize that being wirh people brings me much more contentment than watching TV by myself in my bedroom, and that sitting in the sun and is one of the best sensations in the world.

I stayed up exra-late on Friday night to shave my legs so that I could wear a sundress on Saturday, and it was worth the loss of sleep.

Getting up at 6:30 in the morning doesn't even hurt if it is sunny outside.

Also, I learned something important: If you are upset about something beyond your control, you should go to a drag show. Yep, you should. It is a wonderful idea.

Advice If You Happen to Be Around Me Lately

Embracing the Booty Shorts: Part I

Do you see these shorts? I own them, or at least a pair that looks just like them. And in three weeks time, I will have to wear these shorts onstage and dance around. They will have a pair of nude tights under them, but STILL.

I don't wear shorts. The last time a pair of shorts was on my body in a public place, I hadn't yet gone through puberty yet.

Since receiving my booty shorts in the mail, I have been wearing them almost every day to get used to them. And you know what? They don't look half bad. That doesn't mean that I suddenly love my legs and think that they are super hot and sexy, but with tights and booty shorts, they are perfectly respectable legs.

So that's good to know, I guess.

As long as no one looks too closely.

Flat Line

I haven't had anything to write about lately. Life has felt like a flat line for awhile. It has been cold and gray and windy and gray and cold. I've been watching "Gilmore Girls," and eating a lot of yellow foods. Mangos, pineapple, cheesy toast.

I have fallen in love with Jess, Rory's second boyfriend.
I haven't done the majority of the things that I should have done.
I've spent lots of money on coffee to give me something to do.

Starbucks doesn't actually have very good coffee, but I've been going there a lot more than normal. There is an odd, shallow-yet-satisfying ritual that I've formed lately, which involves me, a girly magazing (preferably "Marie Claire" but I'll settle for less) and Hawthorne Starbucks.

So I was sitting there about a month ago, vaguely trying to disguise what I was reading, when this lady comes up to me to tell me that she likes my hair. "Is it henna?" she says.

"Why yes it is henna!" I says.

Then she told me that she used to live in Sweden and that she henna-ed her hair etc. etc. And I told her where I got my henna. And she was a friendly, cute middle-aged lady, and we had a nice interaction.

Then I saw her again a couple weeks ago, and we talked about henna some more, and she was just such a nice, happy lady.

Culmination: I saw her at Starbucks this week, and she came over and talked to me, not about henna, but just for the hell of it, because now we have become occasional Starbucks friends. Which I kind of love.And here's Jess, my TV lover.

Probably the Scariest Thing I Can Think Of

I have never driven in Spokane. Not even one time. Not once. But when I am in Portland, I drive. Sometimes/most of the time, I drive at night. In the dark. In my parent's Honda Civic, which I park in all sorts of places around Portland. All. Sorts.

I have an unfounded fear that there will be a man hiding in the backseat of my car when I come back for it, and that I will get in and start to drive without noticing that he is there. And then, when I am on a dark roadway in the late hours of the night, he will slowly sit up, and I will look in my rearview mirror and see his face.

That's as far as I have thought.

Have you ever seen the movie "Rocketman?" I haven't seen it for about ten years, but as far as I can remember, it goes like this: A wee young boy wants to be in an astronaut. He then grows up to look just like the Bass Player from "That Thing You Do," and he becomes the stupidest astronaut ever, and he goes to the moon and does silly things and falls in love with the hot-lady astronaut, and I think there is a monkey in the story somewhere.

This movie contains one of the best exchanges ever, and here it is:


Dumb Main Character Astronaut: Were you ever afraid that there was a baker under your bed?

Smart Supporting Character Astronaut: No.

Dumb Main Character Astronaut: Well did you ever check?

Smart Supporting Character Astronaut: No.

Dumb Main Character Astronaut: Then how do you know there wasn't a baker under you bed?



Wise words, Dumb Main Character Astronaut, wise words.


I always check for the baker under my bed.


And by "baker," I mean "hiding-psychopathic killer."

And by "under my bed," I mean "in the back seat of the Honda Civic."

This Cat Like Vegetables And You Should Too

When I graduate, I am going to start a new blog that will be called, "Vegetables For People Who Don't Like Vegetables." And I'm going to buy weird vegetables from our neighborhood co-op and make them into delicious, nutritious dishes and then take pictures of them!

Woop!

So that will be fun. I also plan to consume an entire bag of baby carrots every week.

Starting next week.

For realz.